Creating Harmony

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
- Mahatma Gandhi

“The secret of success is to be in harmony with existence, to be always calm to let each wave of life wash us a little farther up the shore.”
- Cyril Connolly

Creating harmony within your self is a process well worth the effort.

Make sure you have some quiet time alone. Have a journal or something you can write on to capture your thoughts. Put it in your reach where you can easily sit up and write something easily.


  1. Lay down or sit in a comfortable position and close your eyes.
  2. Take a few minutes to relax your mind and your body.
  3. Begin to think about inner conflicts that arise inside you. For instance, you might have a recurring conflict between a part of you that wants to arrive at a gathering on time and another part that wants you to get one more errand accomplished. Or you might think about a part of you that wants to relax and play and another part that thinks you should get your chores done. Maybe you experience the fairly common conflict of wanting to eat comfort foods but also wanting to be healthy and trim. Whatever your inner conflicts are, let them float through your mind.
  4. After a few have emerged, sit up and capture them in a simple way like:
    (a) Relaxed and on time vs. do more and stress
    (b) Relax and play vs. chores, chores, and more chores
    (c) Yum food vs. healthy food
  5. Get back into your relaxed position and state. Continue letting a few more common internal conflicts emerge. Then sit up again and capture those. Continue doing this until you have between 6 and 10 internal conflicts written down.
  6. When you have 6-10 inner conflicts captured, open your eyes and sit up. Look over your list and see if there are any patterns or themes that you notice. For instance, in the examples above, two out of the three inner conflicts have to do with a struggle around doing vs. relaxing.
  7. If you have already put characters in your Round Table, see if you can name the characters in your conflicts.
    • For instance, in 4(a) above, the character that wants you to do more is the pusher, while your angel character wants you to feel relaxed and the absence of stress. Let's call that angel character 'The Realist' who knows how long things really take. The conflict, then, is between The Realist and The Pusher.
    • In 4(b) above, The Pusher shows up again: “Do one more email before you leave for the party.” The angel voice in this example might be 'The Nurturer,' who wants you to live a quality life that has rest and relaxation. That is not so far from The Realist, who wants you to plan well enough and be honest with yourself about how longs things take so that you can relax.
    • In 4(c) above, we meet two new characters: 'The Glutton,' who only cares about the moment, and an angel character who is looking out for your best interests over time. Let's call that angel character 'The Wellness Coach.'
  8. After you go through your conflicts and choose names for the characters who are fighting with each other, line them up so you can see themes. The examples would line up like this:
    Angel Character: Traitor Character:
    Realist Pusher
    Nurturer Pusher
    Wellness Coach Glutton
  9. Becoming aware of and labeling these inner conflicts is the first step to change them. As you notice them arise throughout the week, simply say to yourself, “Oh yes, there's that conversation between The Glutton and The Wellness Coach,” without trying to change it. Pay attention to the impact of simply labeling the inner conflict has on you.

Next week, we will take another step to create harmony and peace.

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