What are you Protecting Me From?

Most of us don't like the parts of ourselves that get in the way of us feeling good. We want to get rid of these parts, or at least lock them away. The problem with this is twofold:

  1. We can't get rid of any parts of ourselves. If we attempt to do so, that aspect of our self gets stronger, and
  2. These parts play an important role in trying to protect us.

If we find out what the character is trying to protect us from, then we can figure out how we can address that fear in a less restrictive manner. That will be the focus of a future blog. For now, let's delve into how to find out what the traitor character is attempting to do. What purpose are they attempting to serve?


When you become aware that you are starting to react rather than respond, engage in a behavior that is familiar but not really what you want to be doing, or doing a self-sabotaging behavior, consider doing the following:

  1. If you have not yet named this character, give it a name like 'procrastinator,' 'avoider,' or the like. If you have already named this character, then go to step 2.
  2. Ask the character what it is here to do, and then wait and see what bubbles up in your mind.
  3. Ask the character what it is protecting you from and wait to listen inwardly to what bubbles up.
  4. Ask the character what it fears might happen if it doesn't protect you...and wait to listen inwardly for what emerges.
  5. Enroll your angel to talk to this character to let him/her/it know that you are appreciative of all the work it is doing to protect you. You are aware that you needed the protection when you were young, and you now feel as if you can handle the situation differently.
  6. Listen for the response that emerges from this 'fallen angel.' Usually, internal characters are really doing their best to keep you safe. They are also afraid that you are going to try to get rid of them. This is your chance to tell this character that you want to find a way to utilize the strengths that he/she/it brings to you but not have it keep you stuck.
  7. Listen again to this character's response and engage in negotiation until this internal character feels valued and is ready to shift so that you can take more risks.

Write in with challenges and successes you face while doing this. And, more than anything, have fun as you make friends with these traitors and find out what they have been protecting you from your whole life.

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